Today

Another very busy day.
Up and fed Holly this morning, got some housework done, worked on L's montage while Holly was asleep (its coming up really well), fed her again, managed to have a shower at about 1pm, made a million phone calls about our holiday, booked in the tax man cause we haven't done last years tax, booked in Holly's hip X-ray. Then got a phone call from the bank man wanting more paper work done so I was in a panic to do that before close of business so we aren't delayed with out finances. Did some more housework as my mother in law arrived, she took Holly for a walk and I went and did some party decoration shopping for L's birthday next weekend. I got a whole heap of soccer themed stuff, handy that the world cup is just around the corner, there is heaps of soccer stuff in the shops. All I really have left to buy is plates and serviettes and maybe some plastic glasses.
I just about lost it this afternoon, I was so stressed. Some times I honestly do just feel like the weight of this household is on my shoulders, I'm the organiser and L just goes along with it. Sometimes its really frustrating, especially when you know that if I don't organise it it won't get done and then we'd be up shit creek. I feel bad for L bearing the brunt of my frustration, I take it all out on him. He gets home from work and cops it from me. I just feel like I don't get a break though, its not like going to work. When you go to work you get to switch off, you have morning tea and lunch and then you can go home from your work, leave it and forget about it. This job is just full on, you don't get a lunch break - I had lunch at 3pm today cause I was doing stuff. And at 5pm, you don't just get to switch off and go home, your work is at home. When I feel like this I really question whether I do want to be a stay at home mum, whether I should go back to work. But I know I don't want to go back to work while we have Holly. Most days aren't this bad I guess. I think I'm also feeling frustrated cause the house was really messy. Its amazing how much it can build up and get on top of you when there is limited time.